This is a post I didn't want to write.
But I am going to do it. And you will see why I didn't want to by the next two words I type.
This isn't a post about him. Yet, it is a post entirely about him.
Everyone, and I mean everyone, has given their two cents on this heart shattering event. And I am going to be honest ... I hate it.
I hate it because most of what I read is from people who have no idea what they are talking about. But in our world of social media, we all have to talk. We all have to say something. Because heaven forbid if we let an "opportunity" to participate in the buzz topic of the week slide.
One of the only articles I didn't hate was this one. I think everyone should read it. Because it teaches, "Suicide is an act that makes perfect, terrifying sense if you're suicidal, and no sense at all if you're not. If you don't understand why someone would kill themselves, I am happy for you, and I hope you never do."
And let's clarify before we get any further. I have never suffered from depression. And I am not suicidal. Yet, for someone who has not suffered from depression and is not suicidal, I sure know a lot about it. I am not an expert by no means, but I know more about it than I'd ever care to know, but in the same sense am so grateful I do.
I am tired of people calling it selfish.
I am tired of people calling it courageous.
I am tired of people declaring what is and isn't okay to say about it.
I want people to live. I want them to want to live. I would hope with all of my heart that was an action and the desire everyone wanted every moment of every day. But it's not. And if through their depression or through their despair they cannot find that desire and do make the action not to live, I do hope they find the peace for which they are so eagerly searching, the peace that they were unable to, for whatever reasons, receive on this earth.
And if that is wrong of me to say, so be it. There are more troubled and aching souls than I think we would allow ourselves to realize. How dare I judge their ache? How dare I judge their actions? Because we just don't know their heart, their sorrow, their ache, their pain. We just don't know what dialogue repeats in their minds.
To those of you that feel no desire to live, I don't fully understand, but know there are people who are trying to understand. And know that there are people who have that desire for you to live, even when you don't. Please, please keep living, even if that desire is not there inside of you. It is inside of so many people who love you. Live off of their desire for you for the time being. And please, please know, there is always help.