Where have I been?

But honestly, I cannot go into that right.

But what I can go into is this:

Just because someone is abducted does not mean that were abducted by aliens.

I was told by a client that she liked the color of my shirt ... Which would be a nice thing if it wasn't code for she thinks my shirt is too low and immodest. Doh.

I may or may not have bought a new pair of Nikes ... which I totally did not need.

I realize the only shirts/clothing I can stand to have the brand plastered on them is Utah State University and Nike.

Osama bin Laden was 6'4". Is anyone else shocked by this?

I have a really difficult time taking anyone genuine who refers to people, especially people they don't know as "my lovelies."

Speaking of creepy ... Oh, we weren't speaking of creepy things? We are now. I watched a computer animation of the raid in Pakistan. It remind me of dreams I have of being shot down.

Oh, and referring to practical strangers as "my darlings" is as equally awful as referring to them as your lovelies.

The Disneyland half marathon is full, much to my dismay. When looking at the website they actually referred to it as being "SOLD OUT". That seemed strange to me.

I do fidelity checks on the behavioral paperwork at work ... It sometimes makes me feel like I am a school teacher. When making correction I use a highlighter and itty-bitty post-it notes. I always make sure the two colors coordinate. Do you think the staff notice?

Some changes were made in my office at work. It now feels like a call-center with how many people and desks we have in the space allotted.

I have a very good friend who, believe it or not, can smell better than I can. She can smell smells you would never imagine. In fact, she smells smells you would hate me for telling you about. Unfortunately, I have now experienced something that has left me very, very empathetic for her. It also left me gagging. For an indefinite amount of time.

The following remark came from a small child who was being naughty, and upon receiving a threat from his mother that he would have to go to timeout if he didn't shape up, "Do your worst, hippie!" Bahahahaha! I am now going to make it my solemn duty and obligation to find all opportunities to repeat this phrase. :)

"Do your worst" reminds me of The Count of Monte Cristo ... which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes of all time, "I want to be free of you ... the way you, obviously are free of me." Sigh.

At my job I have to track what I am doing essentially every minute for eight hours. Including check-in and check-out times for each project I work on for each client {42 of them} that I write behavior plans for. Poke.my.eyeballs.out.

I stepped on one of my favorite flower headbands and broke it. Yes, it is the same headband that Jillian Jiggs just fixed for me mere weeks ago.

I love, love, love, love, love it when my house is clean. I love all the dishes out of the sink and dish drainer, with the cabinets/stove/table all cleaned off and non-cluttered counters. It.makes.me.happy! I.must.find.a.way.to.make.sure.this.is.the.norm.in.my.house.

Maid in Manhattan is currently on in the background. The only thought I have on that movie is this: there is no way on this green earth Jennifer Lopez would fit into any outfit that Natasha Richardson fits into.

Which reminds me of a recent partial view of Sleepless in Seattle. If I have learned anything from that film it is this: thank the heavens above we all do not have to dress the way Meg Ryan did in that show! Oh, and that Rita Wilson has clearly had her eyebrows worked on since 1993.

I bought a polka dot skirt for two dollah. That also makes me happy. And I can already think of like one kjillion ways to wear it.

I came up with a brilliant idea. Nooow, I know what you are thinking ... my brilliant ideas aren't all that brilliant. But.this.one.is. It reminds me a little bit of the movie "Julie & Julia." It doesn't involve cooking, but it flirts with a similar concept ... Minus the cooking. I know, I know. Julia Child minus cooking = no Julia Child, right? Just wait for it. I think you will like it. Intrigued?

And lastly, Facebook can be a real big jerk sometimes. Sometimes there are some things I just don't want to know - ever. Yet, FB is always right there are the least opportune time to throw it in my face.

And yes, you did wait an entire week to hear from me to read this. Ho-well. :)

Annnd! I have updated the gold stars! However, I was unable to add the 1,000 stars for following as Blogger is being dang dumb and will not let me look at my followers right now. Interested in earning more gold stars? Lemme know!


Missy said...

haha, you are too funny!

I've had to sign up in March for the disneyland, they cap it at 14,000 runners and it still fills up SO fast! You should do the new one they just announced this year! It's in January and its women only, I'm thinking about doing that one too!

Kat said...

a few things: counte of monte cristo is one of my favorite movies to watch! Also... I love hearing stories about your clients. Another thing, I have a very strong sense of smell as well, even before I got pregnant. It really bugs when I swear I can smell things and other people just think I'm being crazy or making it up. One more thing: you're awesome. kthanksbye. :)

Melissa said...

The thing that shocks me is that Osama Bin Laden was 54 when he died. I thought he was 80.

P.S. I'm glad you're back.

Krystal said...

speaking of USU shirts, I am in need of a new one that is cute... wanna do some shopping for me??

Meg said...

In my experience, the only way to ensure that your house looks the way you want it to is to live by yourself. Roommates, husbands, and children do not always agree on how the house should look. :)

Shan said...

I'm winning! I can't believe it!! mewhahaha. P.S. I feel the same way about dishes that you do. And of course I always want to earn more gold stars.

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