4.29.2010

The odds ...

You have a one in 6,000 chance of injuring yourself every time you shave.

Your odds of becoming a professional athlete are the same as the odds of your parachute not opening up while skydiving.

Your odds of winning the lotto are the same as meeting and befriending George Clooney.

If you are between the ages of 20-30 you have an 86% chance of getting married.

If you are between the ages of 30-40 you have a 74% chance of getting married.

If you are in your 40's you have a 40% chance of getting married.

If you are in your 50's and single, you are more likely to be attacked by a terrorist than get married.

If you are a girl and have a close guy friend, he is twice as more likely to fall for you and want to date you than you are to fall for and want to date him.

And most importantly ... you have a one in 10,000 chance of being injured by your toilet.

No need to thank me for the enlightenment today. As always, just throw money in my general direction.

***
P.s. Does anyone have any toilet injury stories? Please share. Please, oh, please share.

8 comments:

Chixon said...

I don't personally have any toilet injuries but I did read two years ago about a woman who sat on the toilet for so long her skin literally grew around the toilet seat. I am NOT making this up. Go to http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23595533/
I believe I deserve 1,732,450 gold stars for sharing this with you and changing your life--just remember, no matter how bad things get ALWAYS remember to get up off the pot when you've finished your business and you'll be doing just fine.

Allison and Josh said...

haha! I feel enlightened! I don't have any toilet injury stories, but a few years ago one of my good friends was kind of dating this guy and one time when he was over at her house, he broke her toilet seat when he used her bathroom...that relationship didn't last long.

Natalie Willmore said...

and 95% of surveys are made up on the spot :)

Jeremy and Marie said...

Does a mental injury count? On a sophomore orchestra trip to Canada, I was caught with my pants down in the hotel room. Becky, Katie and Emily Jensen opened the bathroom door while I was doing my business and they snapped a picture. Honestly who does that?! It was actually pretty funny.

How about the lack of a toilet and having to do it behind a tree, who ever does that? haha!

Kristin said...

Ma ha ha- toilet injury. I do remember one toilet issue I had. I cliff dived at Lake Powelland totally bruised by behind and back of the legs big time. You can imagine my relationship with the toilet seat was very poor for some time.

Krystal said...

so all of the odds are in my favor... does he really like me? And is he more likely to fall for me? All I know is that based on the odds, I hope I am not still single at 50... oh dear!! No funny toilet stories though, sorry...

Jo said...

Both my brother and my son have been injured by the toilet. I think your statistic would only be accurate if it excluded little boys who are learning how to pee standing up.

DeeAura said...

HAHAHAA - the toilet one made me laugh. :) Here. Have a $20.

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