2.23.2009

Thanks, but no thanks ...


One of my roommates and I finally decided to start attending a family ward.

No, this doesn't mean I have given up on finding a husband.

Family ward ... awesome. In Sunday School there are usually three people under the age of 40. The rest are senior citizens. Daniel* said, "Oh, that's perfect! You sit with the senior citizens at Aggie basketball games and now you can sit with them at Church too!" It is awesome. {P.S. Stop mocking, you hater ... just because you have to stand the entire game.}

Anyway, everyone is super friendly. Love the ward. Love the crying babies, the awkward 12-year-olds passing the Sacrament and the little-ones who share their testimonies on Fast Sunday.

However: enter flaw number one. My roommate and I got a call from the Primary president this week. She wanted to meet with us after Church. Naturally, she can't give us callings, so we were a bit curious as to what she wanted.

Just looking at her, she looked super nice and maybe in her mid-fifties. So far, not so bad. But then she spoke. First sentence, "Hi, my name is Pat** and I am single and never have been married either!"

Ugh! AG! AH! WHAT?!

I sincerely appreciate the thoughtfulness of the Bishop and Pat ... thinking that a little chat with a single-for life woman would help ease me into the family ward and the single life {as if I just entered it by entering a family ward}.

BUT:

And that is one large ghetto, junk-in-the-trunk BUT ...

DO NOT PREPARE ME FOR A LIFETIME OF BEING SINGLE.

DO NOT.

Ahem. Let's recompose ourselves.



Dear Bishop and Pat:

Thanks. But no thanks.

Sincerely,

Mindy M. Thornley _________

{I will fill in that blank when I get married.}



___

*For those of you who don't know, Daniel is my BFF. Yes, even after the tragic M&M incident. P.S. After he stole them, he went home for the weekend. I was very unhappy about not being able to have M&Ms at work and informed him of this late Sunday evening. He had no intention of returning to Logan until Monday sometime. Buuuut, he drove all the way from West Jordan to Logan {1.75 hours-ish} at midnight, only to wake up at 7:00am to give me my M&Ms at work first thing in the morning. Sure, he shouldn't have taken them in the first place, but way to make up for it, Mr. Roberts.

**Remember, Pat is the name I have decided to use for anyone who I want to keep anonymous. Aren't androgynous names superb?

13 comments:

Mike said...

Sad about the Aggies. One star.

BreAna Palmer said...

That is so funny.

Meg said...

Some people just don't understand that FAMILY wards are actually just EVERYBODY wards. I'm glad you're enjoying it. There are a lot of things that are really good about being in a normal ward instead of a single's ward.

I think a far better way to ease a single person into a family ward would be to introduce you to someone you could sit by who could use your help (young family, especially a young mother who has no husband with her for whatever reason) or who would like a new friend (could be anyone, but a lot of older folks sit alone and would love to have someone sit by them). That way you get to know people who aren't in exactly the same place in life that you are and it's a great experience for everyone.

But that's just my opinion. Oh, and I need another star for the Aggies losing. :-( I was very sad about that, too.

DeeAura said...

HA! Ah, yes. Pat. But seriously - when have you ever seen a male primary prez? eh? Okay, that's what I thought. And you are too freakin funny. LOVE you. Hahha. :)

Krystal said...

* 1 star for the aggies losing

OK, so I had a similar problem, though I cannot go to a family ward because apparently being a school teacher is code for "I'M DYING TO GET A PRIMARY CALLING" which happened to me last time I tried it... so I swiftly left! BUT, here's my annoyance... It was recently pointed out to me that I am now eligible to attend the "25 to 30s single association" activities at the institute... so the last few times I have gone, they've brought great speakers in to inspire us:
1. Sheri Dew (still never married, too old to have children even if she does get married)
2. Wendy Watson Nelson (married in late 50s to Elder Nelson after his wife died; never had children)
3. Barbara Perry (2nd wife of L. Tom Perry. Married after his wife died also. Never had children)
4. Steve Young (maybe this was to teach the guys that it's actually okay to get married really late in life and to play for as long as possible??)
HOW DOES THIS INSPIRE ME?? Oh wait, it doesn't... grr...

Scott, Andi and Jack said...

OH BARF! For the love. Pat is a crazy talker.

Toni said...

Ugh. That's all.

Allred Mom said...

Hey! 2 points for me! 3 fingers and the Aggie loss! That was a bummer! But, they are making up for it!

And, Great, positive attitude in that post! I'm looking forward to that space after Thornley being filled in!
I may just have to "Officially" meet you that day face to face!
:) And, another trip to Utah for me would be a great thing!
So..keep me informed!

..FYI..For those of you reading this and wondering "Who is this woman?" Let me introduce myself... I am Mindy's official, long time, old friend, who knows much!

Linze Kate said...

On a positive note, your experiences always lead to the most classically awesome stories! My stories always are really lame, so... Yea.
Okay, maybe that's not better.
I loved your letter in there to Pat and the Bishop. The end.
*muah*

P.S. PB M&Ms.... That would be mine...?

Linze Kate said...

P.S. Did you cut the hair all off or just trim it???

Dennis and Amber Ogilvie said...

HAA! I love your story! I want to thank Pat and your Bishop for giving you the opportunity to make me laugh out loud at the computer yet one more time! Thanks for the story I needed it today. Please don't be discouraged by Pat you know many of us think the WORLD of You! BTW we bought plane tickets to come home in Aug. Notice how I still call it home!

Krystal said...

* star for Krystal * You always have PEANUT M&Ms in your desk... And you were very upset with Daniel for stealing some once upon a time.

AND currently, I am trying to work on midterms and am all out of my pink valentine peanut M&Ms and going crazy... I can't concentrate to save my life! I may have to make an emergency trip to wal-mart tomorrow to make it through the weekend...

jill said...

2 million stars for the aggies being awesome.

p.s. tourney? please say yes.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...