First, I'm coming down with a cold, so I currently sound like a man. But that's beside the point.

Okay, actually, it is the point.

This entire post is going to be about how I sound like a man when I am sick.

Why are you still reading? Who in their right mind would read a blog entry about a girl, who when sick, sounds like a man?

Okay, so I am lying. I am not going to dedicate any more of this post to my man voice. The rest is going to be about a current struggle I have.

So, there I was. In an apartment at Liberty Square in Provo, Utah. I was with one of my most favorite people on the planet, who, for complete anonymity purposes we will refer to as "Lance." :) We were both waiting to go out to dinner with his family who were in Provo. They had come up from their home which, again for anonymity purposes we will say was in Mexico, to drop their youngest son {Lance's younger brother "Lad"} off at the MTC.

As we waited, Lance asked, "Will you do me a favor?"

Being the absolute gem of a person that I am {and clearly humble too}, I said, "Sure."

He then said, "I am horrible at sending packages. Will you send Lad a package once a month while he is on his mission?" Without thinking what that fully entailed, I immediately agreed to do so.

Fast forward eight packages into Lad's mission: I am completely clueless as what packages 9-24 will be! Help!

Things I have already sent him ... a USU football t-shirt {so he can support the 118th best team in the nation}, a Chad Is Rad t-shirt with the country of Chad on it ... Why would you give this to a boy named LAD? I have no clue. ;) , his favorite goodies - all of them, and letter-writing accessories {pink stationary included}. Things I know I can send in the future: a Halloween package, a Christmas package, and gift cards to restaurants near his area.

Now what?

I went to a good friend of mine for assistance ... Mr. Google. I typed in, "Creative missionary packages ideas." Little did I know that creative was another word for lame!

Here's just a touch of what I found:

Favorite toothpaste {to brighten your missionary smile}.

Mr. Clean Magic Eraser - it's light weight {easy on the postage} and my most useful cleaning tool {cleanliness is next to godliness}.

Pens {choose the "write"}.

Sewing kit {because being on a mission is sew wonderful}.

Smarties {because that new missionary haircut sure make you look smart!}

Raise your hand if you are ready to vomit already.

I am so sure that Lad, and all the other 49,999 missionaries out there want pens. AND a sewing kit! ANNNNND a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser! His companions sure would be jealous!

So, what do I send him? He's not even in a foreign country and I am considering sending peanut butter!!


As incentive:

One golden star to anyone who actually reads this.

Two golden stars for any idea that makes me chuckle.

Three golden stars for each idea I actually can use and actually send to Lad.

Half a golden star to all who can decipher all the anonymity aspects of this post. :)

Another half golden star to all who know what the word decipher means. :)

Okay. That's all. Word. The end.


Mike Lundberg said...

Oh, I'm really excited. I read the entire post, Lance is Chance, Lad is Chad, and Mexico is New Mexico, and decipher means to interpret or decode. I have made a huge surge in the gold star area the last few weeks! I am pumped!
Some of the things my mom sent me on my mission were just stuff from Deseret Book. You might want to just browse around there and see if anything catches your eye. And I just have to say, 24 packages is fairly ridiculous. I think I could count the number of packages I got on one and half hands.

Bethany said...

thank you mike for not giving any suggestions for packages and just using this post to get gold stars. who's lame now?
1) you know those little cardboard/plastic basketball hoops you can hang on the back of the door? i sent one of those once and the boy went crazy. 2) new socks might sound lame, but who doesn't love new socks?!?! 3) i made my brother an awesomely good flip book for christmas. i just got pictures from distribution and got them laminated and spiral bound them. (pictures of the first presidency, the 12, different temples, a pic of my FAMILY, etc...you know...the basics.) my bro loves it, but mind you he is in another country... 4)the latest and greatest efy cd...duh. (and i have like 10 extras, if you want one.)
okay. thats all i can think of for now, but i will keep thinking. i havent been in package sending mode in a while...but i'm here to help my friend. or you can laugh at these ideas, delete my post and end our friendship forever. you decide.

Cassandra Anne said...

Two words:

Temporary Tattoos.

Meg said...

I think you should send him a "Dear John" package. These are always the most entertaining from a girl the missionary never dated. You include things he "gave" you -- such as random pictures of guys (any random pictures, I mean, it's been 9 months, are you really expected to remember which one he is?), throw in a teddy bear, or any other silly things that could have been gifts. If nothing else, he ought to get a good laugh. And, of course, write a great Dear John letter to accompany it (as your last post shows that you have great letter-writing abilities). Douse the whole package in some perfume and send it off. :)

Oh, and I would guess that it is Chance, Chad, and New Mexico, as far as the deciphering (figuring out) goes.

Toni said...

One of my favorite things I sent my brother was a flying monkey. Yep. A flying monkey. I sent one to him and one to his companion. It's a little stuffed monkey with giant rubber bands in the arms, you use each paw like a sling shot and catapault the monkey across the room/at your roomates/at the ups man when he unknowingly knocks on the door, etc. And as it flies through the air it makes a screaching monkey sound. Hours of entertainment. I have two with me in my apt right now :) You can get them at magic moon toys in logan, and I've also seen them at bed bath and beyond. And get one for yourself. You won't regret it :)

Krystal said...

ok, here we go, game time:

A - I read this top to bottom :o)

B - I sent hot sauce packets from Taco Bell once... they have funny sayings on them and made the missionary chuckle (she also tried to make "ghetto" mexican food with them, which was hard in Italy). Another one worthy of a chuckle is the Valentine package I made for the same girl... buy every kind of hershey kiss and make a hugs and kisses package (chocolate - first kiss, caramel - deluxe kiss, almonds - the "braces" kiss; and other flavors and kisses as available. I labeled it "the only real action you'll be getting for 18 months!)
C - Real idea: Coupon book, then he tells you what he would like in his packages. Coupons can be for conference ensigns, specific candy / treats he can't get in his area, music (mix CDs... they get bored with their music pretty quickly), talk tape (have all your friends record a little message for him, or record the aggie fight song so he can play it over and over and over), then make one that is a "free choice" and he can ask for whatever he wants (my roommate did this and the boy redeemed it after the mish with a ring!)

D - you are talking about Chance (EFY dude, right?) and Chad, not Lance and Lad

E - Decipher means to decode stuff into "ordinary" language (or to dumb it down, like I do with my kids on a daily basis!)

Ok, there you go. Hope my ideas are both funny AND useful.

PS, get well soon! I have been dealing with a cold for most of September! grr....

PPS, tell Bethany I want a copy of the EFY cd! :o) I will even trade some gold stars.

Marie and Jeremy said...

Okay, he is a spoiled missionary, but here are my ideas...Get him something to entertain the little ones he is teaching...a pig that poops jelly beans, they do exist. A small toilet that sprays water. A cow keychain that squeezes out poop. He'd be the favorite most memorable missionary ever! A woopi cushion for practical jokes.

Marie and Jeremy said...

p.s. I WANT A STAR!!!

Scott, Andi and Jack said...

Well the one thing my dear brother Erik missed the very most while a missioning it was a spicy chicken sandwich from Carl's Junior. You could send him one of those.
Scott suggests new garments. Hmm that might be fun for all.
Once I sent a friend a bunch of little ctr rings in spanish so he could give them to the little kids.
But I think the Dear John package takes the cake

I Am Immense, I Contain Multitudes said...

Don't judge me, but actually I would have loved a mr clean magic eraser on my mission. I was fed spaghetti so much on my mission and it splatters like crazy.

Krystal said...

PS, I voted that you DID send that letter :o) it just seemed like something you would do! And last night I had a nightmare that you were appalled by my package suggestion (some missionaries did not think the kiss package was very funny)... So does losing sleep count for anything?

Allred Mom said...

Okay...as a mother of past missionaries....Send fun stuff!
Glow Sticks!...They are fun to break in the bathroom and have a glowing toilet! (Yes, we've tried this and our missionaries, too!)

For his birthday send..a cake mix, frosting, candles, and balloons...Even if they are "baby shower" balloons! LOL

Toilet cleaner....Have you ever seen those missionary bathrooms? Well, probably not...at least we hope not...but they need this! LOL

Flavored bubbles! A missionary can have a great time with the kids in the area, just blowing bubbles.

Pajama pants! It's getting time for winter! lol

Send a PIZZA cookie. Make a cookie on a round pizza pan and send in a pizza box! (Try the cooking Mindi! You can do this!)

Send him a new tie! By now he is sick of wearing the same ones over and over again!

Did I get any points for any of this???? I sure hope so...

Brandon and Erica said...

Hi....why I haven't posted in five years? Because I just got back from a two-week trip, and I would much rather catch up on my friend's blogs (notice, "friend" was singular :), than actually be posting on MY blog.

So, here's an idea to send Lad:

You should send him a "fake" engagement picture/announcement of a girl named "Cindy" and a boy named "Lance". Or, heck...why not just send him a REAL engagement announcement!!! :-)

Daren said...

I read it and even made the effort to post! I don't know how long ago she did it, but Heather added your blog to the list of blog friends on our blog. Better get to studying for my Criminal Law Midterm tomorrow!

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